Quirky Drinker Pillows

"Most would order red, but I prefer a fine, dry white with my jerky."

Welcome! Milk Convention!: 'Bourbon, milk chaser- no, make that milk, bourbon chaser.'

'The first cocktail.'

'I would like one of your driest martinis in one of your finest sippy cups.'

The devil you know and his plus one

Peel poker.

Baloneystini

"Hard day at the office Dear? You're swigging the Balsamic Vinegar."

"Now this is what I call an honest little pub!"

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

"...an excellent fighting lager with just a hint of park bench."

'Not one customer all day! What's the matter with this corner?'

'Rotgut whiskey is much more festive served with a paper umbrella, don't you think?'

Things I didn't know about before 2020.

Introducing Brocco. The world's first broccoli-flavored liqueur!

'Business's sure a lot better since we started adding your Dad's stuff.'

Mobile phone in bar asking for a pint of beer

"Gentlemen - raise your glasses'

"I want a wine that's wise but unassuming, and not ashamed of a screw on cap."

the Lesser-known Nogs

Trendy new La Croix flavors

"I thought it came with an acorn."

'Film extras drinks night'

'Hi. I'm Major Fixer-Upper.'

"Tuna Colada"

"Why - do I LOOK absorbent?"

"Sorry, we're all out of grog, Honey. But, we have plenty of water -- distilled, fresh and ocean."

What, you've never seen coffee with a worm in it? The Too-Early Bird.

"Your martini, sir, with iceberg lettuce."

We're diversifying. Behold: chicken eggnog!

'Do you know how to make something called 'Casketon the beach?''

'...46 and still have Principles...'

"We don't get a lot of call for double-shot-espresso-vodka-prozac-mocha's."

'Can I interest anyone in a Chateauneuf-du-Popsicle?'