Quirky Dining Gifts

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

Fast food restaurant: fast service and eating.

"Give him his food."

'Your starter, sir.'

"...Today's special is the ten-day-old roadkill..."

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

Kentucky Fried Horse

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chop

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'The customer is always right...'

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

Sushi Train Spotters

'Can I get a box for this?'

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

'I don't eat red meat. That's ok, this is gone green.'

Our Troubled Chowders

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

Roadkill Restaurant

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

Fast Food Restaurant

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"