Quirky Cost Analyst Gifts

"There will be a charge for cactus needles as part of the treatment."

Department of efficiency and cost analysis.

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

Looking for the cause of high health care costs. . .

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

"I'm aware that you brought a high-powered agent...are you aware that this job pays $26,382 and nine cents per year?"

"We re cutting back on overhead."

Budget Cuts

"Don't think of yourself as just another small cog in a vast bureaucratic machine.. but rather as a quite important cost centre."

'I've saved a bundle on cubicles. I only hire mimes who do that invisible wall thing.'

'Children are all right, Carson, except they're so damned unprofitable.'

"One good thing about a low budget district, the school year is shorter."

You take'm through the nose, you pay through the nose.

"We're going to cut out the expensive, boring stiff and just build the top."

"Fred doesn't take photos. He relives our vacation memories by viewing credit card receipts."

"At your opening, I see that you had two glasses of wine, eight pieces of cheddar, eight crackers, and seventeen grapes. That, of course, will have to come off the top of your end."

"Step in here Kimble, I'd like a word with you about your expense account."

'Who are you calling Napoleon?I'm just going to pay you!'

'If you want to meet your target to reduce overheads I'd suggest you sack me. That'll be £13,000 plus VAT.'

"Cuts, cuts! I said we need more cuts!"

Snake charmer tries to improve the sales report.

"If there's discrepancies in my tax returns, don't blame me. Blame the guy in the alley I paid $20 to do them."

"After reviewing your credit history, I'm going to refer you to a specialist in Mexico."

'How much does this book about inflation cost?'...

"I look after her tax affairs for �1,000 - she wanted �2,000 but that's all I could afford."

"Hey, I'm sorry...cutbacks, y'know!"

'Can you believe that seven women, that's 83.5% of females in the 21-50 age band who are present, think I'm boring?'

'An unpleasant customer will come to see you? Well, remember that there are three good buddies who can help you: garlic, onions and beans.'

'Forget the early withdrawal penalty. What I'm taking out, I didn't put in!'

"So then Mr. Brewster, who was a cost analyst for an advertising agency, drove his car all the way from Westport, Connecticut, to New York City!"

Detour to your house.