Quirky Confession Fans Gifts

"I've got a confession to make love, I'm a secret pyromaniac"

Priest's 'To do' list.

True confessions.

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

'Someday I'm going to tell you all of the things I've done right.'

'Okay, so it's not a violin, but he is playing our song.'

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

'Don't get me wrong, the Church is glad to hear your confession of improper contributions, but only the I.R.S. can grant absolution.'

Admissions lady: 'I don't take care of myself like I should ... my negligence probably killed a guy once ... I'm secretly attracted to you ...'

'I'll tell her all about this when she gets home.'

This Saturday 10:30 Confessions of a Window Cleaner, Doctor, Nurse, Policeman, Shop Worker, Lollipop Lady, Butcher, Baker, Housewife, Schoolboy...

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

'Well, for the sake of argument, just pretend you've done something wicked.'

Priests Play Good Priest, Bad Priest

The Confessional: a bored priest listens to a confession.

'I've been disrespectful again, Dad.'

"Look, they get really mad when I dig up the garden, so, can you please sign this statutory declaration..."

"Never seen a cow before?"

Priest says to man in confessional: 'Blah-de-blah ... come on, get to the good stuff!'

True confession

"We always see a spike after April 15th."

"What's this, a confession written in code. . .?"

"What a listener. My burden feels lighter already."

"Clark...is there something you'd like to tell me?"

Confession plugged up to an amp.

'I fancy you like mad, Miss Prentice.'

"I am dyslexic, parked in a faculty space and wore my roommate's t-shirt."

"He knows what you did in Las Vegas."

Admitting: 'I'm not fond of my mother-in-law. I don't like my wife's meatloaf. Ummm, oh my neighbor really bugs me, ummmm....'