Quirky Competitor Gifts

Competitive Picky Eating

Umbrella fight.

'By the way, no one has ever beaten me and lived to tell about it.'

Unfortunately for Billy, the night before the big contest, his spell checker crashed

You're right, there's nothing in the rule book about it!

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

'Say when you want me to start!'

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

Danth battle?

"Must you use the cat's litter box to practice your sand trap swing?"

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

Sniffathon: The Dog world's version of a Kissathon

The Cricketer and the Golfer

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

Plane with banner shoots at another.

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

It had taken a team of engineers at IBM over a decade and had cost more than 50 million dollars, but that nigh, when Eat-Bot 4000 finally broke the record for hot dogs in an hour, it was all worth it.

'It's just possible that the best candidate is the one who wins the Spoon Race.'

Skateboard Olympics.

"Hmm, offhand, I'd say you have a nasty case of tennis elbow!"

A Man mixing up his sports.

'What the . . . no wonder we can't gain any yards. We've been fitted with radio collars...'

"Better - but it was still too obvious when you went for the pine tar under your hat."

'Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can pretend to beat up your dad!'

Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can reach a higher plane of consciousness than your dad!

"Your serve is basically good, it's just you're doing something funny right at the very end."

"My ship didn't sink. I swam here from New Jersey to get into The Guinness Book of World Records."

Annual Lump Festival Competition:'I don't know if I can give an award, they're all so fantastic..'

"See. I told you they have Roomba Rodeos when we're gone."

100m Flies Race: Entomological Olympiad.