Quirky Comedy Collector Gifts

"O.K., now walk forward causally."

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Occu-Pie Mars

Larry's used art

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

Seagiraffes

Build your very own conflict of interest!

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Bert's dog training.'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

Duck Hunt

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Banana Split...

Raincloud Umbrella

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Eat me"

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop