Quirky Care Enthusiast T-Shirts

'It's a wonderful new drug...a sort of injectable garlic.'

Football Crazy strip six

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'I have to admit I was skeptical at first, but their hooves are magical, Magical, I say!'

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

Egg Buggy

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

Man with money in hand reads instructions on 'Check prostate' vending machine

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

"It's all locally-sourced, made from scratch."

'What's wrong with you?'

"You were smart to come see, Mr. Lewis. These moles on your back definitely look suspicious."

"9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer."

'And now Patrick will tell us how music has helped him with his problems.'

A Mom and Pop Operation

"Your husband's laryngitis will probably last another wee but your blood pressure is nothing short of miraculous."

An unlicensed acupuncturist

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

Plastic Surgery

'I'm worried about my brother, doctor!'

"I can't help you with your chronic whistling. You don't need a psychiatrist, you need a musicologist!"

"Why do I always get the stupid wobbly table?"

'With the added weight on their chests, donors can give a pint of blood at a time.'

"The inspector's not getting older. He's getting odder."

"Odd - you have bad cholesterol, good cholesterol, and some cholesterol that wonders why everyone can't just get along."

Obstetrician's office: Innies and Outies.

"Mrs. Jennings, can Billy come out and smoke?"

Vet checks fish's heartbeat with a stethoscope through fish bowl.

Tapeworms Need Love Too

Circus News

Square peg in a round hole: 'I say if it feels right, do it.'

"Not that one...the big one on the top shelf!"

"Thanks goodness, I thought she was pregnant?"