Quirky Appliance Seekers Pillows

"With this new attachment your kitty can continue to sleep on the TV!"

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

Roasted

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

Entertainment systems

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

"My compliments to the can opener."

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

"To toast!"

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

"Does it come with magnets?"

Microwave. Do you have any idea of the time pressure I'm under?

"I was supposed to rinse them first? So, you're telling me somebody designed a machine to wash dishes, but we're supposed to make sure we wash the dishes before we put them in the machine?"

Castle drawbridge opens to reveal a dishwasher

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

'So you just dry stuff? That's cool, I guess. I mean, it's not like there's some mystical force that could do that for you, like, I don't know... evaporation.'

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

How the cords get all tangles up when you're away.

"Unfortunately, our user-friendly toaster is warranty-unfriendly!"

Tonight's Lecture: Earth's Biodiversity at Risk. Obviously, they've never looked inside my refrigerator.

When it came to appliance repairs...Joe wasn't one to mince his words!

'And exactly where did you find the 'antique salami slicer'?'

Why don't you look at ME that way?