Quirky App Collector Gifts

Death App

Beta finger app

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

The Uses of a Stethoscope

Cat hunting in a cuckoo clock.

The other digital divide.

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

'Beer? Wassat then?'

Signed Baseball - Scientists,

Migrating Cuckoo Clock

'I wonder if I should add this to my resume.'

With the evening all to herself, Kate put on her 'UPS Drivers Gone Wild' video.

'No you do a great job. I'm letting you go because I don't like your cell phone ringtone.'

Evolution...the modern-brush fox.

Psychiatry. Here's your soda --- Would you like a crazy straw?

"Where'd you get the business mitts?"

For the new gardener.

'I get 23 stations and a place to hang my coat!'

For the War Inventions Board. The Hot-bottler for Warming high-landers' Legs after a Night in the Trenches.

'Dang it! I can't find a voting app.'

' . . . and a surplus screw for the heck of it!'

"...while 86 million prefer grilled cheese, and 57.4 million of them like mustard on it."

'I'm not keen on getting any more apps, but I just had to have this one - it takes my unusually neat handwriting and digitally converts it to sloppy doctor writing.'

"You still haven't told me why your last girlfriend dumped you"

'Our new app sells for $100 and detects intelligence. If a customer buys one, they don't have any.'

'Wait a minute, if this is a stair lift then where's the stairs?'

'Go away. I'm not buying any of your junk.'

Funky Facts: A Baby Koala is called?

Cat with mouse tie.

The last will and testement...