Quirky Antiquarian Gifts

Something for Everyone!

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Raincloud Umbrella

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Archimedes statue with a lever

'What clan do you belong to?'

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

Best before 65 million BC.

Karataoke

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Letter Collecting Nerd

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

Ice shelfie.

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

Fishing for Birds

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.