Quicksand Quipper T-Shirts

'I still have a soft spot for my ex- like quicksand!'

"Don't be such a stick-in-the-mud, Harold. You're holding up the whole group."

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

'That's your third bowl of gruel this week! What is this -- a feeding frenzy?'

'Is the water cold?'

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

Airport

Not-Quite-Quick-Enough Sand

Access Denied!

Broad Minded

Death Watch

Corona virus: "Wow, I seem to be getting lots of attention lately."

'What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?'

'I mean, how totally lame is this? Just as the marketing for our new video game was about to go viral, the Center for Disease Control shut us down!'

"We've agreed to count it as both a wave and a particle for tax purposes."

Back Down

"Okay, we got one cherry lager, with bitters and a pineapple slice, and one honey malt ale with cinnamon and an orange weist. You want these in steins or parfait glasses?"

"Photons have mass, but their rest mass is zero."

Over. Under. Sideways. Kid.

Poor Walt - they don't make em like him anymore.

HELP WANTED - man in quicksand

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

Pandemic playhouse.

'No! I don't know why they call it quicksand when it takes so long to kill you. Now shut up and help me think of a way to get out of here.'

"But we had stir-fry last night and the night before."

"What town are we in??"

The head of a man sunk in desert sands

The light at the end of the tunnel just got switched off.

"You have an anti-addiction...everyone just hates you!"

Wilkins refused to sink to their level.

"For god's sake, man! Quick! Blow out the candles!"

Gordon Ramsay's Own Brand