Quicksand Dodger Gifts

"Let's play in the new course they built on the swamp, you say. It's just a sand trap, you day!"

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

Not-Quite-Quick-Enough Sand

'Roy! Over here! This line is way shorter.'

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

HELP WANTED - man in quicksand

Poor Walt - they don't make em like him anymore.

'No! I don't know why they call it quicksand when it takes so long to kill you. Now shut up and help me think of a way to get out of here.'

'You always have an excuse when it's your turn to buy the drinks.'

"I've asked you never to call me during naptime."

'Now I know why they call you Cinderella... You're always running away from the ball.'

"For god's sake, man! Quick! Blow out the candles!"

'I thought it was your round.' 'It was, but I'm trying to get in touch with my feminine side.'

As the summer drew to a close, Mrs. Bank's back-to-school nightmares progressed from a class of her worst students, to a class of their parents.

'I know I shouldn't bite, but I keep thinking about that poor slob up there...hot, tired, hungry...'

Wilkins refused to sink to their level.

The head of a man sunk in desert sands

"Ugh . . . nevermind."

"I can't wait that long."

Fish using a metal detector to avoid fishing hooks.

'Talk about rough courses!'

"Tell me about online banking again. I'm not good at technology, but it's got to be less stressful than this."

'I still have a soft spot for my ex- like quicksand!'

"Don't be such a stick-in-the-mud, Harold. You're holding up the whole group."

"The thing you have to know about quicksand is the faster you shake the shaker the faster you sink,"

Sorry out of numbers.

'I thought this was your round.' 'It was, but I'm trying to get in touch with my feminine side.'

"On top of everything else this is a bureaucratic nightmare."

Look before you leap.

"I've been called for jury duty. How can I get out of it?"

Dancers caught in quick sand.

'Help me, help me!'

'This is just so like you. Always taking the easy way out.'

"Thank God for the elephant."

Having shrewdly camouflaged themselves, the Glubermans found a way to avoid long lines at Disney world.