Queue Jumper Pillows

"We'd like to begin by boarding all passengers who feel impatient."

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

Test your patience, back in one hour.

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

'Oh good! - I hate long lines!'

"General, last night while we were here, encamped for concert tickets, the enemy encamped across the river for theatre tickets."

'I think you'll find that I'm next. . .'

"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

Thanks TSA

Time-Off Coupons

Congestion Eases Inexplicably

Limbo services: 'what gives...this line hasn't moved for hours!'

"In my defense it is an exit and the line was really long..."

"Hey, you can't cut in line like that! - Who do you think you are?"

"I want to complain about how long I've had to queue to make my complaint."

Beach Bouncer

Young against old

10 items or less queue. (Woman has thrown eggs onto floor).

'You'll have to excuse her - being on hold with Disneyland Paris has sent her goofy...'

'So close! If only you hasn't cut in line here!'

"I told you we had to leave earlier."

'Next time?'

"My milk is gonna spoil if I stand here any longer."

The health dept. begins psychological audits...'And last summer at the bank, when the line was moving very slowly, you started shouting. What was that about?'

Express Lane Ten Items Or Less Or A $5 Surcharge.

Line Forms Here / Line Ends Here.

"I identify with shorter lines."

"Mr. Jones, the doctor says it's OK to move you ahead of the queue and he'll see you now!"

'Uh - oh... it seems the cashout queue was really long today...'

'I like being last in line. That way, I'm the last fool to part with his money.'

"Pardon me...shouldn't I be ahead of you? My private plane plunged into the icy waters off the coast of Maine over a week ago!"

'It says here the D.M.V. got hit by a robbery today that took 3 hours. . . you know how those lines are.'

I've had four espresso shots and a red bull. Look out post office, here comes Sadie! Post office? You're fueling up so you have the strength to endure the long lines? Ha. I'm creating the lines. I get to the counter with a stack of complicated questions, then watch the people behind me go nuts with frustration! Bwah-ha-ha-ha!!! One of the best maniacal laughs in the business.

Airport Wait