Quarrel Connoisseur Gifts

"I just downloaded fact-checker...fancy a little quarrel?"

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

Quills - Sizes 1-9

Curling your hair for no reason

Mrs Sutherland and her American Hairless Terrier.

Imagine

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

'I like to wear women's collars.'

S**t Threw a Goose

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

"I'd like a wine that was born in France and then bummed around California."

'The Entrecote a la Bordelaise? It's stuff on a plate.'

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

'Thank you for noticing, Shirley - but beauty comes at a price, It hampers my hunting, limits my berry picking and typing's a real pain,'

"Fill it up!"

Impatient queue of people. The signs read queue here,sigh heavily from here, and Tut Loudly from here.

"Hey dude, when I said curls might help, that's not what I meant."

Cat Video Cinema.

'Maybe if you make it smaller, put something soft on the end and come up with a better name than 'Cue-Tip'...'

"I'm working on a watercolor."

Blue wine

"Are you certain that we have already detected all types of quarks?"

"Five ball in the corner pocket." "Me in the side pocket!"

"Have you met my wing man?"

One more please.

"We have a Sauvignon Blanc to refresh your palate or a lick of this toad to obliterate your sense of self."

Witch reads book titled 'Cackle with Confidence'.

Swell who has called a police officer to pick up his umbrella rather than bend and disturb his collar

'Honk if you know the meaning of life'

'We don't own a shredder. We just hang sensitive material on the furniture and let the cat take care of it.'

"Why am I always the bad guy?"

'Order somethin' else, Mae, today's prospector ain't quite dead yet.'

"I think this one will suit you, 'A dizzy little number, with a hint of musty socks'."

"Her name is 'Precious', but her nickname is 'why we can't have nice things.'"