Quandary Solver Gifts

'What's excessive-times-a-trillion-divided-by-two?'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

Albert Einstein

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

The Map of the human brain

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

Can do...No can do

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

'You know too much!'

Eureka!

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

Extinction of the dinosaurs fully explained

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

Wordplay: Gastropod.

'He's not supposed to go out.'

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

Archimedes helps Sisyphus