Putt Perfectionists Gifts

Sink the putt or else!

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

Do you want to win the game or my business?

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

Surreal ale

'Aren't you glad we brought our putters, too?'

Golf lessons

'Not that slowly back...'

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

'Oh, this will be good! He just putted into a sand trap...our litter box.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

For sale - Used only Once.

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

"This is great. I've been playing miniature golf so often I almost forgot what regular-sized golf is like."

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'Do I take it that you will not be requiring my services on the back nine?'

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

"Just a drop."

'Call it a hunch...but I don't think he feels too confident.'

Quality Contorl.

There are more things to life than golf--but I ignore them.

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

Man in Office playing golf, filing cabinet draw marked 'Rough'

'Oh no. How are you going to get it out of that little hole?'

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'

'On this hole you don't drive, just putt.'

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

Certificate for 98.4% accurasy.

Ventriloquist's fete

'You're away, Doc!'