Puppy President Gifts

Self-Employment

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

'Hey Winston, this is my dad. He's obsessed with sitting.'

Balloon dog training

"Timmy, your dog looks just like he does in your drawings."

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'

Four Star Meal

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

"I can only tell you what's in your future - it's up to you to chase it."

'It's a wonderful new drug...a sort of injectable garlic.'

Discipline at Doggy School

"Loyalty is a quality that people have lost, but dogs have kept."

...or how about this gorgeous little puppy ma'am? He's a Labrador Collie cross.

"The circus was good but as 'Jo Jo, the dogged faced attorney', I'm making a killing."

''Woof, Woof, Woof.' You call that a blog entry?'

'The man at the shelter promised he doesn't bark at all.'

Canine at the Westminster Pit - Lord Palmerston and Lord Derby

"While your resumé said one thing it's come to our attention that labradors actually shed quite a bit."

William felt out of place in the dog obedience school.

"The dog training class we sent him to is working, he has just texted to say he wants to go walkies."

"Nobody seconds, now sit down and shut up."

"OK, ten minute break. Stretch your legs, lap some water, nibble some chow..."

'Just ignore him - he's threatened to run away before.'

"Don't listen to those pampered puppies at obedience school: there's no shame is being a working dog!"

"This isn't obedience school. This is much more useful."

"Thank you for your participation in our loyalty rewards program!"

The Canine League of Nations

Cat on a hot tin roof.