Puppy On A String Admirer Pillows

Bored at the City Morgue.

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"Now I really hate poetry."

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

"When the world gives you mean and macho, reach for licks and love."

"Good boy, what a good boy. You're hired."

Violinist.

"Meow"

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Puppy.

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

There are no rats with collars...

"Okay, who's purring?"

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

Dogs and Chickens

'I hear you can tell how big they will get by the size of their feet.'

Pet owner hanging Obedience School diploma

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

"I love it!"

"They were bred originally to be hors d'oeuvres."

Peace talks between cats and dogs break down after Rusty, the lead negotiator, suddenly runs outside to chase a car.

"Show some appreciation when he comes home: he spends his days in a small cubicle staring at numbers on the screen. He puts up with a lot in order to feed us."

"Oh my god, you guys, a puppy!"

"Is that all it does?"

'Oh! She's such a pretty ba-a-by!! Yes, she is! A Pretty, pretty ba-a-a-b!...'

"You are not what I expected."