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The Paunch & Judy Show

Puppet hitting child with noisy phone

A Puppet Named Juan

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'He does.'

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Personally, I was hoping for more from the intermediary process.'

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

"I believe we have a quorum for the meeting."

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

"I don't know, do you think we evolved from the sock monkey?"

Ventriloquist Grave

'Just reading the minutes back will be sufficient.'

And now, for a rebuttal.

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

'I see the critics say I need a new partner.'

"I've called you here to discuss some issues because this big sissy didn't have the guts."

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

'Are you hiding something from me? Is there someone else?'

"'Ere, mate - you look like a right muppett..!"

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

'I know, but he's a genius.'

"She said don't forget the straw."

'You ought to get out more according to experts.'

"I feel like we're finally making progress."

Pubertry

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'