Punny Pounder Gifts

Weight and Fortune.

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Dogs life

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Pet Cemetery.

Dog Walker

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"I'm afraid there will be more cuts."

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

Licker Store

The Poodle and The Twooudle.

'Nice try, Billy, but dogma is not a puppy's mother!'

"Hmmmm. I'll bluff. Then they'll counter-bluff, so if I counter-counter-bluff...password should do it."

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

'Not too serious just a couple of particles collided.'

"Photons have mass, but their rest mass is zero."

'Play dead.'

Why cats don't cook. (sign on wall reads: Federal Law requires all employees to wear hairnets)

"So the vet says, 'If this is my thermometer, then where's my pen?' . . . Get it!? . . . IS this thing on!?"

". . . But, according to your cat, you had a fur ball contract."

"Find another place to dump that crap. This stall is occupied."

"My wife disposes all of my disposable income."

conversing using table tennis technology

"He's a shiitake."

'I'm not the first visionary who's been accused of extreme optimism.'

"Duffer, Penny, Bailey & Coco. Attorneys at Gnaw."

"Do you think there might be a bitcoin in it?"

'I can't make ends meet, let alone justify the means.'

Right jab or left jab.

"I'd like to let you go, Willy, but this is your third offense."