Punny Driver Pillows

SCUBER

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Cats on Board.

Cake Free Zone

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

Happy Hog - Manet

"The next time you have an 'emergency', have it on the roof like every other self-respecting bird!"

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

Speed limit 70mph and up.

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

Don't even dream of parking here.

Frog rearview mirror ornaments.

Funky Auto Repair: 'Bad driver special: But first repair job, get 2nd repair job, half price'

'We'd like a GPS device that would direct us to affordable gas.'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up this office, and you'll pay the price.'

Weight and Fortune.

Dairy. You're called "ruminants" because you chew your cud --- It's not an excuse to overthink everything.

My Smart Car keeps pulling toward the library.

The Off-Roading Commuter

"I'd like to let you go, Willy, but this is your third offense."

"I propose we put all our eggs in one basket."

'Look, you still owe us 17 cents.. if you sweep up my office we'll call it even.'

'Inner-city kids in search of a butter life.'

'I think I just invented 'Rock 'n Roll'.'

"Where's the red cape, pal?"

"Well, well! Looks like someone's not a happy camper! Get it? Happy camper? We're camping? Happy...cam...ahem..."

No, Ernie --- Female chipmunks aren't called chip-nuns.

'Bailiff, tell maintenance that I need my bench raised again.'

No caption. (Two drivers side by side. The car on the left is driven by a human and there is a Christianity symbol in the form of a fish on the back. The car on the left is driven by a fish and there is a similar symbol in the shape of a man on the back of the car).

'I don't care what you say lad.....I say he was speeding!'

"You never said your 50,000 shares were penny ones!"