Pumper Ponderer Gifts

'How come gas prices go up more in summer,when people drive more?'

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

Keystone XL

'U.S. Manufacturing'

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

Fracking Zone - Be prepared for anything.

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

'Are you sure its a purbred?'

'Mind you, I'm not responsible for the entire pipeline ?' just the section that flows through my office.'

'We don't have a health plan, but we have a very nice cemetery right out in the churchyard.'

"What d'you say we try sneaking out before the last one?"

"I wonder if he's talking to me?"

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"As I said to Steve: if they don't ship oil in that proposed pipeline...it's going to make one heck of a water slide!"

'From the book of more-factual nursery rhymes.'

'I wonder how you flush this thing?'

Oil consumption.

'I'm part of the losing things generation.'

"I feel bad about eating them...but they're so yummy."

World Demand Price Up

Reindeer in a conga line do the limbo beneath a pipeline.

'Who crossed the road first, the chicken or the egg?' Francis has always struggled with philosophy.

'He's so cute Jean! How old is he now?'

The Ekert Saga: '...So I thought you should know...even for Danae it seemed a little weird.'

How to tell that the plumber you hired learned his trade in 'the land down under'.

Solar Energy Pipeline Leak

Genie promises magic oil.

Golfer uses 'eeny, meeny, miny, mo' to decide which club to use.