Publicans Gifts

"Let me guess - stout and bitter?"

Conservatives in Power Disappoint the Licensed Trade

'Why do you knock them back so quickly?' - 'I had one stolen once.'

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

2021

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Campaign for Plain English

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

vaccine wars.

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

The Three Wise Queens

"I had a fear of speaking in front of people, which is why I shadow puppet and sing the lessons."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Inclusive speech

'No ice.'

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Medical personnel give their hearts

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

Fighting Covid