Public Television Fans Gifts

"We ought to send PBS some money so it can afford better pledge-break specials."

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

"Grandma's TV is so old it wasn't made in a foreign country."

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

TV Situations vacant.

Moses' TV guide.

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

'We have lost the video and voice audio, but will continue with the laugh track.'

"Whatever happened to traditional marriages? There they are...on national television...with millions of people watching...two women getting married! And they're both wearing blue jeans!"

I lost as a contestant on the quiz show, but they gave me this lovely parting gift...

"I know I say it in every episode, Carson, but the world is changing and we have to change with it."

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

'PBS is weird -- they just ran an eight-hour commercial about how they never have commercials.'

'Let's see what's on the war channel...'

'If you smiled in the mornings, you'd come up in the ratings, too.'

99 Dalmations - Edited for television.

'Too much TV, maybe. Is there a John Wane marathon going on?'

Baby in carrier is watching TV on dad's back.

"We've had to rename it, no one watches talk shows anymore."

Televised Insomnia Benefit Telethon puts couple to sleep.

Plato's Dialogues & Letterman's Monologues.

"This Fall on NBC: Fish Out of Water"

'Tell you what, if you show us how to switch channels, you can join our club.'

"Maybe he's been watching too much television"

The Masterpiece Theatre Gang