Pub Stories Gifts

"Ok Buddy. No more AB negative blood for you tonight!"

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Beer Stall

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

"An everything Martini, please."

'I know it's gassy...'

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"Have you seen my dad?"

"What other tricks does he need?"

"I forget to drink."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

Barman In Love.

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

'Did you hear that? They said 'Hello' to you.'

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"Just water for me, please."

Redhead

'A rose tattoo for your lady friend sir?...' A female Tattooist offering a rose tattoo, in the way of the old Rose Ladies in clubs and pubs

Joyce could certainly handle her drink!