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"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

"So, when did you first have these overwhelming urges to spend �100s on therapy?"

Freud analyses himself 'Interesting. But what makes you so sure I'm your delusion. Rather than vice versa?'

'We'll get nowhere until I understand your fondest hopes and desires. Let me analyze your hard drive.'

"The only way you can get a second opinion is to go through fifteen years with another analyst."

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

Sigmund Freud.

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

"I'm the bad guy..."

Pavlov's Puppy

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Day for day i feel more and more empty.

"Folks, if you look out of your window at those clouds below, you'll have a nice view of the Grateful Dead dancing bears."

'Waiter, there's a Fly-Agaric in my soup.'

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."

Blok drives by New York City.

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

'Carl Jung loses it...' 'don't tell me I made a Freudian slip - it's a Jungian slip!'

"Leon, do you think it's all psychological?"

Free-Floating Anxiety

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

Psychiatrist with bust of Freud

Pavlov's Cat

Regardless children just want to fit in.

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

Gangs of New York

Mummy Shrink.

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

Unsmiley face at the psychiatrist...

"My brother is always trying to one-up me. As soon as I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder he said he had tripolar disorder."