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"And only you can hear this whistle?"

A man and woman face each other in profile. A diagram of their brains shows their desires.

"You have got to want to change."

The Freudian Slip Shop.

"What'll it be, Tyler - your lunch money or heaps of verbal abuse?"

'It says the best way to stop undesirable behavior is to ignore it.'

Little Voice Inside My Brain...

'I utilize the best from Freud, the best from Jung and the best from my Uncle Marty, a very smart fellow.'

'So tell me, Doctor, how long have you been suffering from these hallucinations?'

"Gordon's got very low self-esteem. Haven't you? You bald headed four eyed twit."

'I'm sure I paid you in advance, didn't I?'

The Unpublished Freud

Mental detector.

Coming to a consensus.

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'They found your gene for anti-social behavior, but they're still looking for he one for robbing liquor stores.'

Jocasta Mothering.

Dinnertime At The Pavlovs

There are two tunnels; one has the entry sign 'gratification' and the other has the sign 'Delayed gratification.'

Man reading 'Nudge Theory' is pushed over.

'Do you mind if I take the rest of my session to get your input on investor psychology?'

The Dr. Fairy Godmother Show: 'OK, if I were to fix that... And trust me, it ain't gonna happen... What long-term effect would that really have on your life?'

Santa to shrink - 'I don't believe in myself.'

"Some sort of schizophrenia, doctor?"

Pavlov's Cat

'I blame my parents, they never set me any standards worth rebelling against.'

'Your inferiority complex is so bad, maybe you should see a more competent therapist.'

"Schedule the 'voyeur' and the 'exhibitionist' for the same time. I want them to meet."

Expert witness in attention-deficit case: 'Sure I'm familiar with...look at this....'

"I'm doing a lot better now that I'm back in denial."

Student to psychology teacher: 'Are we going to learn all the states? Like the state of contentment, state of being, and state of confusion? ...'

'It's OK, being completely egocentric is perfectly normal for someone your age.'

'I don't want to be of any trouble, but do you have a copy of,'Winning Through Intimidation'?'

A long caged bird once liberated will sometimes fly back to the familiarity of its cage!

Conditioned reflex.