Proud Partner Gifts

"Just six months ago, he was completely feral."

The proud husband who's wife just lost thirty-five pounds: 'This is my wife Sandra, Greatly reduced.'

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Shepherd and eurydice

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'I sent out for everything.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Come dine with me!

"Ahhh... close enough."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Butterfly Woman

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

You're my Mona Lisa.

Larry's used art

The Busy Gardener

Polly txt speak

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

Police Feline Unit

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'