Property Repair T-Shirts

'Oh my, your gutters do need a good clean...'

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Jack of all trades

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

Tool Box

'I found the termites!'

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"See this area right here, honey? This is why we need to find someone who knows what they're doing."

Do-It-Yourself. Do-it-yourself-With-Good-Friends-and-Pizza-and-A-Few-Beers.

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

"Want to impress me with that hammer? Try using it to fix a few things around here."

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"