Property Markets Gifts

"This one's called. Make Me An Offer."

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

Home Sweet Second Home.

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

"Try not to think of it as a box, but rather as an environmentally neutral, biodegradable, single person unit of accommodation!"

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

Real Estate Personals

An exaggeration of estate agents

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'The Dow has shot up 2.5% on positive data on housing - until five minutes from now, when it'll be interpreted differently.'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

Home Foreclosed Home.

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

'It's all about location, location, location!'

Igloo sales

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

Turtle Home

House hunting is cruel.

Those who fail to learn from the past will be forced to relive it.

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

'They're playing house.'