Property Market Critic T-Shirts

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

'I'm hoping to have the finances in place, to move into a cardboard box soon.'

Boom & Bust.

Affordable housing

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

House hunting is cruel.

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

Shoe house.

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'My expedition confirmed what we already suspected: Two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered by water, and the rest by real estate!'

'Look, they're slowing down.'

Real Estate Crispy Flakes: Location/Location/ Location

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

Today's dream house is nothing if not a fantasy.

Real Estate Life

"We're sitting on a landbank that could accommodate tens of thousands of new homes. We can wait a few years and generate even more profit..."

"When you pay the rent for your one-room studio, you mustn't think about what you can get for that amount back in Iowa."

Battery Farm Housing

'We finally got a response to our House For Sale sign. The wind blew it down.'

"Those days of being able to sell any old c**p have long gone!"

'I came up here because the meaning of life is location, location, location.'

'It's got all the original features.'