Professional Sleeper Dreamer Gifts

"That vacancy for a 40k a year mattress tester doesn't exist...."

Night-time halo

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

'At lone at last.'

Painting taking root...

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

Interpretive napping

"Being with you is just getting too surreal for me, Larry."

"Ambitions... to make a career change from tourism to sales."

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'Your wife has had triplets. I suggest you go home and get some of the sleep you won't get in the next several years.'

Fingers

'Dali'

Wide-awake.

I was awake all last night. Me, too. I'm exhausted. Ditto!! Thank heavens for work. And for today's staff meeting! It's the only place I can sleep!

"This can't be happening! I'm supposed to be a cool adult! At least I bet I have a cool car!"

"It's 2 A.M. Do you know where your p***s is?"

'You are in a deep, deep sleep, when you awaken you will feel sweaty and exhausted...'

"Someday we'll look back on these and-times and be really envious."

A quick escape from a business meeting.

"Good news, your yacht club membership has arrived!"

The Home Birth of Venus

"If I let you put a blanket over your cubicle, Hartley, I'd have to let everyone put a blanket over their cubicle."

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

'Why have you put that pen and notebook there?'

A sleeping man counting scuba-diving sheep

'Freelancing might be a viable option.'

'He gets his best ideas that way.'

Sleeping man leaves rest room.

The Princess and the Pea

A pink cloud hovers above a sleeping man

'I'm applying for a job training program to become a dairy cow instead of a beef one.'

Do you think it's too late for me to go to law school and position myself for an appointment to the Supreme Court? Yes, unfortunately. You'd have to go back in time and start preparing early. By that I mean WAY back. As in you'd have to ensure that the cells that formed you had genes that would give you intellectual curiosity, above-average intelligence, and ambition. But you do still have time to become a layabout. You seem to have prepared very well for that. What? You'd still get to wear a ro

The artist