Problem-solving Detective Gifts

"May I get an equation in edgewise."

I think you oversold the whole silver bullet thing --- Everybody talks about them as if they're the solution to everything.

'I fixed the problem you were having with your word processing software. The spell check was set on pig latin.'

'Texting, one, two, three, four, texting, one, two, three, four. There that ought to do it.'

Guided Missiles Design Office

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

hard-boiled egg...

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

A boy acting suspiciously

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

Detective and child follow footprints using magnifying glasses.

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

"I wanted a Meticulous Monday or a Thorough Thursday report. This reads more like a Frivolous Friday."

"Of course, it may be one of those sting operations!"

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

"Enough about the forest, why don't you show us more trees?"

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

Undercover Biophysicists

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of "CSI: Miami" to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45pm? The Youtube generation grows up fast.

"Now how did she know?"

"To 'click to enter' or not to 'click to enter'… that is the question."

'Where my balls go?'

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

Newton's Law and Order.

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Micro and Macro Department,

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'