Private Ponderer T-Shirts

"...I'll sit here pretending to be interested but I'll actually be writing a shopping list and fantasising about my plumber!"

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

Waiting for Pants

'At least I don't have his life.'

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

"I'll bet a lot of people wish they had a royal palace to return to."

"Apparently, over two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered with water!"

Desert Island Surveillance.

"At this time boarding first will be all first class passengers, a.k.a. the more important people on this flight."

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"You're right! It is much easier to explain it this way!"

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'Sure, but king benefits aren't portable.'

Jupid/Jupiter/Jupidest

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"Having a fine old name really has been enough for me."

How moons are born...

Corporate Ladder

"It's a memoir about multiple personality disorder, so it was written in first, second and third person narrative."

'Want me to share your reading on your social media?'

"Nobody ever illegally downloaded my recordings of the Beethoven Sonatas, either."

"Remember to take into account my client had no life coach."

Quarantine: The great equalizer

Hmmm... what's my real purpose? Why am I here? - 'Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! Let me guess!' - 'Go on, then.' - 'Is your life a homage mediocrity?' - 'Ouch.' - 'Quizzes are fun! Ask me more!' -