Privacy Preachers T-Shirts

"His last wish was that we delete his browsing history."

The Anti-Agent

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"Black or white, Vicar?"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

Night-time halo

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

Next gen pregnancy tests.

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

Thou Shalt Not!

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

'Can we sit in the balcony today? Huh? Can we?'

"...and for today only, you'll get 10% off all tithing!"

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Dogma

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"