Privacy Guardian Gifts

Databank - 'If you did it, we know about it.'

'Welcome to Facebook. To reset your password, please enter your Social Security number.'

'Fersteinser believes in strictly minding his own business.'

'But what about the 4th Amendment?'

Uncle Sam is a Pedophile

Move along, folks. Nothing to see here.

'They claim to be taking a census, but I'm sure they're from the Ministry of the Ulterior!'

'Bob! The neighbors are moochin' our high-speed wireless again!'

"My parents call it a blanket hanging from my ceiling. I call it a giant privacy filter."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"I love you too, big guy."

Cats on Board.

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"For goodness sake, not again, it's day-time but we can't see the sky: It must be another oil spill..."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

Privacy Conference Security

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

Privacy - Surveillance

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

'More government surveillance!'

'To paraphrase Franklin Delano Roosevelt: The only thing we have to fear is the NSA, FBI, CIA, DEA, IRS, DIA, EPA, FTC, FCC...'

A Little Extra

Fish want out of polluted river.

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

Statue of Security

"Mr. Miranda....we are using 'schedule 7' to hold you on suspicion of knowing someone who knew someone who was a whistleblower...."

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

Big Brother watching you watch Big Brother

"It's nothing, go back to sleep. I was just getting a DNA sample."

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'