Prison Workers Pillows

'Dear, I'd like you to meet Michel LeCouteau -- we did time together once.'

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

Skeptic Tank.

"I used to be your old school teacher, I always said you would amount to nothing."

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

Madoff and devil.

Freedom Book.

"The truth serum made you say some very hurtful things."

Yoga Sequence to Avoid

'Where did I bury the loot? -- I thought you buried the loot!'

"Cops don't get me. Sure, they got me – but they'll ever get me."

'Apparently my DNA had guilt written all over it.'

'Are you free at the moment?'

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

'Other than the fact that you were a trustee at the county jail, do you have any other character references?'

'These are Martha's Camp Cupcake Muffins - and I've just ordered her new apron from the prison gift shop.'

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

Locking Up Crime

"From where I'm sitting, ha-ha, you're behind bars!"

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

Prisoner Trump

'Well, now we know -- blaming the victim DOESN'T work.'

Exposed and imprisoned.

When staffing agencies screw up.