Prison Chaplain T-Shirts

'-and which commandment did you break?'

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

'My final request? How about 'Who Put The Overalls In Mrs. Murphy's Chaowder?''

'When you said you wrote to prisoners on death row I thought ou offered spiritual guidance.'

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"I used to be your old school teacher, I always said you would amount to nothing."

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

"I see you haven't forgotten how to play with your balls, honey." "Thanks."

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

Madoff and devil.

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

'Where did I bury the loot? -- I thought you buried the loot!'

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

Freedom Book.

'Are you free at the moment?'

"The truth serum made you say some very hurtful things."

"That was a long three hours! I didn't know you had an extended service plan."

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

"I'm afraid the diagnosis isn't good."

'Escape?...Why?'

"From where I'm sitting, ha-ha, you're behind bars!"

'I'm glad you're making friends, Darrel.'

Good Dog!

'Well, now we know -- blaming the victim DOESN'T work.'

Prisoner Trump

Exposed and imprisoned.