Prideful Partner Pillows

'Did I mention that Sam won the marathon today?'

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

The Young Couple

I'd climb the highest mountain for you...

Proud Mum.

'Boasting bumper stickers.'

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

The proud husband who's wife just lost thirty-five pounds: 'This is my wife Sandra, Greatly reduced.'

"It screams, 'I'm bold, proud, and require ample sun protection.'"

'I know it's your best round ever, but did you really have to enlarge the scorecard that much?'

Proud parent praise their child

Did you know that 3 to 4 glasses of wine a day can reduce your risk of giving a s**t. . . but you'll pee a lot more.

"I'm really proud of my daughter. She's a thorn in the side of the patriarchy."

Walk right in. Sit right down.

"And to think, when we met online people said it would never last."

'Don't bother to explain, I wasn't born-again yesterday.'

'That was my first ever kill.'

'He likes to keep his big win a secret but his wife doesn't...'

Man Wins Second Prize in a Knobbly-Knees Competition.

Just Married

Baldo's Life is Sweet Moment: Finally figuring out all the words to the national anthem.

'In other sports, Jimmy Sheinblum once again won the world' strongest man competition after staying married to his wife Zelda for yet another year.'

'...Oh, and I bought some new smalls in town...'

War & Peace

"Just six months ago, he was completely feral."

'You've bought your wife a get-well card every day this month - isn't that awfully expensive?' 'Yeah, but it's still cheaper than sending her to the doctor.'

"I'm not coming in without her."

Proud parent and honor roll student.

Man feels national pride when runners pass.

'Remember, you said if I became an honor student, you wouldn't embarrass me with one of those bumper stickers.'

'It's very fashionable these days for a woman to have a tattoo.'