Prideful Papa Gifts

'...and so begins the generation gap.'

"That's mine!"

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"When did she start crawling?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

'She posted her first blog today.'

'Baby's first two-step.'

Infantry.

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

"Vanessa has done a not bad de Kooning."

"He looks just like your husband."

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

'It's too early to say but my lad may be good enough to swim professionally.'

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

"We're going to the park to size up the competition."

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."