Prideful Papa T-Shirts

'...and so begins the generation gap.'

"That's mine!"

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"When did she start crawling?"

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'She posted her first blog today.'

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

'Baby's first two-step.'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

'It's too early to say but my lad may be good enough to swim professionally.'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

"He looks just like your husband."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."

"We're going to the park to size up the competition."

'Do you have any of those cars with 'My Child Is An Honor Student' bumper stickers on them?'