Price Slayer Pillows

"On price, we always beat the competition. That's where you come in."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

Giant slug attacks a city

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

'I was wondering, Mr. Hartwelder, if I could be paid in money rather than stock options?'

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"Buy stock in a college?...I don't think you can...but why would we?"

'It's only a slug Norman.'

"You can't beat the prices of these big box retailers."

Crazy Ed's Warehouse - body in freezer - "Nobody beats our prices and gets away with it."

Unsubscribe-A-Mole

Performance anxiety lessons, the more you practice something.

'Oh, sure, I should wake him up...but I asked him to kill that thing a week ago!'

'Oh for crying out loud, so there's a spider in the bathtub!!'

How to Get Rid of All the Snow

"Goliath? We want you to defeat a tech giant."

David and Goliath

'no, I'm sorry to say, giving up your bonus has not increased my respect for you.'

'What exactly is it you dislike about slugs, Mister Crabtree?'

Pound shop - 99p Land - 98p World.

'I think I can...'

'Your presentation left them open-mouthed. Every one of them was yawning!'

'Faster Grace, it's gaining on you!'

'Look - the giant is dead! You got your cow back! Stop worrying about the loss of the bean crop!'

Budget Cuts

Buy more than you need - get even more free!

"Dear customers, we are pleased to announce that in five minutes, everything in store will be drastically reduced."

Let me handle him okay?

"The witness may continue. I was just killing a spider."

'Don't worry Hal, I think if you pour salt on them, they completely shrivel up.'