Price-sensitive Diner Gifts

'Eat it while it's still £6.50.'

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

"Would you like to see the markup?"

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

'I knew we should have brought your Marigolds, dear!'

Woman in Restaurant has Menu and Calorie Counter.

'We let our products speak for themselves. This is ‘I Can't Believe It's So Tasty And Price-Friendly In Today's Demanding Market.' '

'Yes, all our flambe dishes come with injury, liability insurance.'

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)

'I'm impressed at your choice sir, you certainly know your budget wines.'

"Tell your chef I'd like something for a refined and cultured palate. For under ten bucks."

Food Prices

'When it comes to our Boef flambe safety is paramount.'

Price and serving size: A guide.

'What price range did you have in mind?'

"Hey, how about putting some cheese on this cheeseburger?" "OK, but it'll cost ya."

"Waiter... This roast chicken. Can I see it's death certificate please?"

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

'I think we might attract a better type of customer if we raised our standards a little.'

Le Cafe - 'No tip insurance, $10'.

"Do you have a lean cuisine, waiter?"

'Considering the state of our finances, maybe you should order the hock.'

Today, we introduce a new feature: Now That's Cheap. ™ We give customers used plastic utensils. We'll wash them after every use. This spoon's got a hole in it.

Diner. Greatest Value in Town. It's "Frugal" maps. My GPS that guides me to the best bargains to be found anywhere.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Probably not.

'Today's specials - Good, Fair, Lousy.

Pick Your Own Lobster/Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chop

"What'll it be - one large risk or several small ones?"

You're economizing. ONly one letter in the alphabet soup.

'I'll just have the soup and the nuts. Skip everything in between.'

"Hmm...I'm not sure. What's good tonight?"