Presentation Warrior Gifts

'As I gaze out upon this sea of smiling faces ... albeit sleeping ... but nevertheless smiling faces ... '

I'm not sure they understood what I was getting at. Yeah, they all looked confused, didn't they?

"I am totally ready for this presentation."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

Ban on Free Speech

Can do...No can do

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

Lethal Presentation

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

Time for More Paperwork

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

In and Out Tray

Late/Too Late.

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

Blue sky thinking

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"One of the most compelling graphic presentations I've ever seen!"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'