Prescription Pro Gifts

Retirement and healthcare.

Glasses

"Sorry for the delay in fulling your prescription. Since you brought it in there has been two new side effects we have to add to the label."

"We're out of the 500 mg size."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

Unrealistic expectations tend to lead to disappointment. . .

Doctors

"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"

'I think you might've over-packed. We'll only be gone for an hour.'

"Whatever doesn't kill me gives me the chance to try new prescriptions."

Bolsonaro's Management of Covid and Climate Change

"Take 4 teaspoons of this medicine every day. . ."

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

"I'm putting you on a stronger placebo."

"I can see you're concerned about the amount of medication you're taking. Let me see if I can give you something for that."

'You forgot you list of possible side-effects.'

"You may believe you've been overcharged, but, remember, you're overmedicated."

'This is a very innovative proposal. It can really shake things up around here. Let's not rush into making a decision too fast. I think you should gather much more information than we need to make an informed decision.'

'A stitch in time saves a malpractice suit.'

'As I said, the medication won't cure you, but it will make you more comfortable for the duration.'

"Take one of these every 4 hours for the side effects from your prescription."

"Marry me, Virginia. My genes are excellent and, as yet, unpatented."

The secret of marriage is chemistry - he's on valium and I'm on prozac

'I'm going to prescribe a new diabetic medication. It's a bit costly. I'll start you off with fifty dollars a week.'

Business Cards.

'Our proposal didn't get the grant, but they want us to teach proposal writing.'

'I can tell this prescription is a phony. The doctor's signature is legible.'

"My job is to confirm your 15 prescriptions are compatible."

'If I knew exactly where I lost his insulin - it would not be lost - would it!?!'

City Travel: 'If I buy my medications in Acapulco, can I deduct the trip as a medical expense?'

A woman looking at a sign in a pharmacy that says "Staff Picks".

'...I forgot to refill my ulcer prescription.'

"With this prescription you get your choice of two over the counter medications free."