Pregnancy Pun Enthusiast Pillows

Welcome to the uterus. Please be seated. Your mother will be with you in nine months.

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"On no, the baby's breach!!"

Maternity Ward

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

'We're hoping to sell the naming rights.'

'You want Chinese food? Are you going to have a baby or something?'

'Here's one I made earlier!'

'Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?..'

"Nine months in here?? I trust I can get out in seven months with good behaviour!"

'When will I start to look 'radiant and blooming'?'

'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'

"Six down, three to go!!"

"I'm sorry, but we're not an online retailer. We can't guarantee delivery in 2 days."

"At which trimester will I be able to communicate with my baby via text?"

"If mum's aerobic classes are to continue I'll need a passenger safety airbag fitted!"

Maternity Wing Sign: Please Wait To Push

Caution: False Contractions Ahead

"After 9 months floating here, instead of a birth certificate I should get a diver certification."

'That's the most extreme linear nigra I've ever seen!!'

Pregnant vs. Old.

The Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Could I examine your cervix?'

The Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy.

Lamaze. I'm sorry, no, we' don't offer any "Gifted Fetus" programs.

The future Muhammad Ali about to be conceived.

101 Placenta Recipes

'Houdini's mother had an odd and difficult pregnancy.' 'Oh no. He's gone again!'

"It's a birthing position, Dan. Quit yelling 'Hike.'"

'Looks like Tungor's wife's waters have broken.'

The baby's really been moving round today.

'Two more months!...who's delivering this baby...the post office?'