Pregnancy Humor Enthusiasts Pillows

"I'm sorry, but we're not an online retailer. We can't guarantee delivery in 2 days."

"Six down, three to go!!"

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"On no, the baby's breach!!"

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

'Here's one I made earlier!'

'You want Chinese food? Are you going to have a baby or something?'

'We're hoping to sell the naming rights.'

'Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?..'

Welcome to the uterus. Please be seated. Your mother will be with you in nine months.

"Nine months in here?? I trust I can get out in seven months with good behaviour!"

'When will I start to look 'radiant and blooming'?'

'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'

Maternity ward on the farm.

Maternity ward (door sign.. push push).

"At which trimester will I be able to communicate with my baby via text?"

Caution: False Contractions Ahead

"Hard to tell...He was wearing a mask."

Maternity Wing Sign: Please Wait To Push

"After 9 months floating here, instead of a birth certificate I should get a diver certification."

"If mum's aerobic classes are to continue I'll need a passenger safety airbag fitted!"

"I told you I was too old to have a baby."

Pregnant vs. Old.

The Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Could I examine your cervix?'

'Houdini's mother had an odd and difficult pregnancy.' 'Oh no. He's gone again!'

The Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy.

"It's a birthing position, Dan. Quit yelling 'Hike.'"

'Looks like Tungor's wife's waters have broken.'

101 Placenta Recipes