Predicting Sports Outcomes Pillows

"Don't waste your money,dearie-there's only one score draw next Saturday!"

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

Footballer and Bacteria.

Cosa Nostradamus: "Listen, you mook. I predict if you don't pay the vig to the Don by tonight you'll be at the bottom of the Hudson by morning."

Horse five to win, unless they change the jockey.

'Our sabermetrics guy has confirmed that last year's team that went 60-102 was bad.'

'As you can see - it doesn't pay to badmouth the quarterback.'

'A ground ball to deep short, handled beautifully by Santana...'

"How do you know he was offsides? How do you know anything? Isn’t it possible this is all a dream?!"

Meet Larry; tenor, baritone, philosopher, social commentator, sport analyst, political expert, relationship expert … and A+ certified plumber.

"He left behind a wife, three kids, and the number one rated fantasy football quarterback."

'If you look closely at the CAT scan, you can see a tiny area of normal brain activity. Otherwise, he's got nothing but a headful of useless sports statistics.'

Pitching guidelines

"How do you respond to critics who say you only play the backcourt?"

"Johnson breaks record so obscure even nerds don't care."

"According to the statistics more people look at cricket statistics then watch the game."

"Matsuzaka has an ERA of 3.88, yet Francona’s starting Schilling. Doesn’t that seem counterintuitive to you?"

"Eh? What? Eh? I'm sorry, I dozed off during all that cross-field and back passing."

'Everyone left, and it's only the second inning. We should have asked them who's going to win.'

'I bet I can tell you the score before the game starts. Nil-nil.'

Women's Football

'On Tuesdays, I bowl.'

Psychic Night: Predict the Score, Get In Free.

'I'm sure that last ball was lbw.'

'He's tiring? What happened to round four 'he's ready to go!'?'

'Oh, I hate sport too, but I just love reading the statistics...'

'It's probably nothing.'

'The team in white are bound to win - look at the size of the other team!'

"What happened, honey? Was your team defeated again?"