Practicing Gifts

Sleeping musician

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

He kept up his guitar practise...

Kid uses his violin as a golf club.

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

Four children playing the flute.

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"How should we divide the teams?"

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

"The 'Sing Only in the Shower' Community Chorus"

'Their daughter plays the violin.'

Caught in the Music

"Bad news, Dad—you're brain-dead!"

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

'Why do I have to do this? -- Violins never solve anything!'

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

"That's right, think of yourself all the time! I'm the one who will be losing a client for the next twenty years."

"...and then while I was at soccer practice they moved house."

An angel bangs a broom on a cloud

'I must be getting good, because my Dad told me to go play for the neighbours!'

'That's a bit better. Persistence pays off - although, not as well as it did when I was your age.'

"I charge by the grain."

"When he left, he took all his things, including his name on the door."

"Never lie to your attorney, Brad. If any lies need to be told I'll tell them."

Sports Lawyers

'If at first you don't succeed...appeal to a higher court.'

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

"I'm ready. Are you ready? Let the billing begin!"

"I always find the Contract Attorney's Special amusing. The price is always in extremely fine print."

"I don't like the looks of this! That's our jury consultant!"

A conductor practising in front of a mirror.

"I think I've lost a step with age. Instead of suing I usually just wind up counter suing."