Pr Guru Gifts

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

'I'm very impressed with how you effectively dodged every one of my questions.'

'Doctor, before you meet the press to explain your theory about space aliens communicating with us, maybe you should take the tin foil off of your head.'

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

'Perhaps it's time we re-branded.'

'Find out why the media is assembling outside our building.'

'What I need now is a good publicist...'

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

'We want the kids to buy it so we can't play up the fact that it's educational in nature.'

'We can still rise to the occasion but, in light of bad press, just not in the company-owned plane.'

'To improve my online presence, I put a picture of Brad Pitt on my site instead of myself.'

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

"I'm not entirely convinced of your strategy as financial PR.."

I heard the Inland Revenue were trying to improve their image.

'I say we start eating nuts and berries, and clean up our image.'

NHS to encourage hospitals to advertise in a more friendly manner.

'Next year we're calling it 'The Occasionally Unsinkable Ship'.'

"We need to improve our environmental credentials, tell everyone on the rigs to start using recyclable cups."

'OK, who wants to be the face-person on this project?'

'Political Campaign Consultants: 24 hour demonizing!'

"No more drinking in public, Senator -- Spin doctor's orders."

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

"It's agreed then, we complain about Microsoft and see if we can get some publicity"

'We need to change our marketing strategy.'

Miss Foster, get me my PR man!

"Whatever the results you get from an election it's important to be able to present them in the best possible light..."

"I work in PR where I provide a dynamic and highly effective bespoke service that can work for you and blah blah blah ..."

Image Consultant

Emergency Marketer

"Martha and Lee are going to be doing our environmental hand-wringing."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'How fast can you hype?'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"National security adviser"

Create some buzz!